I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize