he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
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congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
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