sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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