worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
