and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
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