just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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