I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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