So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
