i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
