Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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