Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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