we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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