then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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