my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
