Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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