Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
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