Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
We don't watch enough power rangers
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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