She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize