considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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