what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I wish you could order shots online.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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