Is it normal to miss your booty call?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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