Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
