Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
