I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
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