As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
