Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
this boner is exhausting
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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