It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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