What a fucking waste of an outfit
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Randomize
