He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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