Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
