I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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