It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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