Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
