okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
