she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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