this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
