My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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