Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
