not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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