just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
i need some magic done to my vagina
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
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