we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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