Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
