Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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