no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize