i just google imaged poop.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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