oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize