Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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