I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
