Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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