I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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