My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
