You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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