Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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